Background noise

I miss my Mom every day. I still can’t understand how its possible. I feel like I was just at the mall with her laughing about something silly. I forget and in my head she is still moving around K-town doing her thing and then I remember that she is dead and will never be in those places again. Its not that I cant accept it because I do its that I don’t want to accept it. She used to read this blog, I could not post for a year and then post and she would read it that day. She loved me so much.
I don’t talk about it any more because no one wants to hear about it. I get it. Its sad and its hard to think about loosing your parent. But its there in the background all the time and it likely always will be.